More work to be done

Radiation therapy works by damaging DNA, especially of rapidly dividing cells like cancer.  It keeps working after treatment is finished, so I had to wait 3 months before doing a scan to see what was actually happening.  Of course our insurance company denied the PET scan, so I did an abdominal/ pelvic CT a couple of weeks ago, and it showed that the tumors are still there.  Smaller, but still there... 

Now I'm waiting for my appointment with the oncologist.  All I know so far, is that it looks like the plan is to continue treatment.  I did 2 of the 6 rounds of chemo before the radiation, so maybe I'll be picking up where I left off. 

I'm feeling surprisingly level about all of this.  These tumors were pretty small to begin with, and now they're smaller.  Chemo sucks, but I can deal with it.  Meditation helps and so does the tremendous amount of support being continuously offered by family and friends.

Up Next?

Up next didn't end up being a scan, ca125 or more chemotherapy...  I got a call from my husband letting me know of a last minute work trip, and I got to tag along!  Within 3 days we were on the plane to Lisbon where we stayed for a week.  Followed by a week in Paris.  Every other November in Paris is the Month of Photography, so I spent as much time as I could in the galleries.  My energy was lower than usual but I didn't let that stop me and I had an amazing time!

Now we're back.  The icing on the cake...  2 months after radiation I just did my first ca125 and it came back this morning-  5  !!  I am feeling tremendously lucky at the moment.

Next...

10 radiation treatments done in a couple of weeks.  Lots of back and forth to the city, some side effects- a little nausea, a little fatigue and a general lack of interest in food.  Now a week has gone by and these are starting to let up.  And I get another "vacation."  3 more weeks until the next oncologist appointment.  Up next?  Probably another scan, ca125 and possibly more chemotherapy.

radiation

Had my first radiation treatment this afternoon.  Felt a little nauseous a while later, maybe nerves...  At an earlier appointment they did a simulation where they lined me up with the machine and gave me 4 small dot tattoos.  Today they used the dots to position me and did a dry run, followed by the treatment which took about 10 minutes.

Oh, and hey!  I forgot to mention...  2 weeks ago my ca125 was

!!!  8  !!! 

Unexpected change of plans!

A major shift in plans happened at today's chemo appointment.  My platelet count took a nose dive, so no chemo for me today.  Radiation will start on Oct 1st for 2 weeks, so we'll give my body a break to bring all my blood numbers back up.  Red cells, white cells and platelets had all dipped very low.  Radiation will be followed by a month and a half or so break, then a PET scan to see where I'm at.  Probably chemo will start back up at that point, but who knows...

It feels very surreal.  My brain hasn't caught up with the news.  It's telling me I should be feeling miserable right about now, but no, I'm already back at home and feeling great!  It also feels a little scary, like if I'm not feeling crappy then I'm not going to kick this cancer.  But my oncologist reassured me that the chemo was working so the tumors are smaller and this is a good time to do the radiation, and it won't effect my outcome negatively.  I'm definitely going to enjoy this small reprieve! 

Catching up

A lot has happened in the month since I last posted.  I had a port (yes, they had a good laugh in the OR) inserted in my chest with a catheter going into my jugular.  Best part about this day was Melanie.  She was so kind to drive me, keep me company and massage my feet!  The rest of this week involved a total mind/body meltdown, with just about every side effect known to mankind.  Week 1 of each round is a double dose- Carboplatin and Taxol together.  This and recovering from a minor surgery pushed me over the edge.  I was seriously ready to give up but luckily the following 2 weeks were much much better.  An irregular heartbeat and my hair falling out were the main side effects.  Highlights of these 2 weeks were a birthday massage with Sar, my sister returning from Europe and a trip to Pier 24 my absolute fave photo gallery.

Round 2 started off with a visit with my oncologist where they did a ca125 blood test.  It went from 65 down to 31.  Not bad for only 3 weeks doing chemo!  The first week of round 2 was pretty crappy but nothing even close to the last time I did the carbo/taxol combo.  Again followed by a much easier week.  Knowing this pattern makes it easier to get through the more difficult times.

Last week I went to UCSF for a consultation with a radiation oncologist.  He had a different approach than the doctor at Stanford.  He is recommending we use radiation to eliminate the tumors sooner rather than later, and keep doing the chemo to mop up any remaining cancerous cells.  This would involve 2 weeks of treatment.  I'm waiting to hear back from them, but my guess is that this will start in the next few weeks.

One of my seriously low points was losing one of our cancer support group members, Liz Esterly.  I've been going sporadically since I was first diagnosed in 2008.   Liz was one of the rocks of our group.  Always there, always cursing, saying exactly what was on her mind, she kept us laughing and was 100% there for anyone needing support or a hug.  The idea of her not existing is a very difficult concept for me to fathom...

#1 of 18

Yesterday was chemo #1 of 18.  17 to go!  I don't feel too crappy at this point.  The infusion center was nice and comfy and the nurses were super nice.  One IV was placed, the only one, since I am having the port put in tomorrow morning.  I got some good napping done thanks to the anti-allergy meds, with Ethan and Sarah's laughter floating in and around.  The photo here shows the view outside, looking onto the salt flats.